Halloween...spooky...scary...terrifying?

I love Halloween...I mean really love it: the food, the dressing up, the drama, the opportunity for craftiness of all kinds. And I've been thinking a lot about why...what does it mean? It is so apropos to the changing of the season, the approaching winter and darkness. It is a time to put on our masks and be brave, face demons, that may or may not be real. For children it is a time to test out different selves and an opportunity to be brave in the face of fear. It is a safe fear. Or at least it should be. It ought to be just a bit thrilling, with the promise of a reward for bravery (the candy, of course). Like so many of our holidays I feel that the true meaning has been lost in the commercialization. Buying the pre-made costume, the perfect replica outfit, the mass quantities of candy. Remember when it was truly home made? When you came up with something funny out of your closet? When perhaps your mom sewed something special? When you had the idea instead of perusing a catalog for an idea?

Our lovely little school respectfully requests that the children wear no masks, show no gore, and use home made costumes. It has taken the focus off of the terror and put it on the bravery aspect, the creativity aspect. They've also taken away the sugar focus and massive accumulation of loot and put the spotlight on little treats, the lovely little home made kinds, even the non-edible kinds. Don't get me wrong, I love me a Reese's now and again, but who doesn't love a caramel apple or a baked goody? So much more delicious and probably healthier, and made with loving hands. That kind of treat you can no longer give out because of the sicko who put razorblades into apples a while back. Children get their loot X-RAYED. It's so sad and so pathetic. We live in a place that is rural and not conducive to the usual trick or treating. I'm not even sure what folks in the 'big city' do for trick or treating these days--do you trust your neighbors, to what extent, how far? Thankfully our little town has a tradition of trick or treating on the plaza and most all of the merchants participate by doling out loot. But as darkness approaches, the age and gore index at the plaza increase exponentially. So we've been throwing an after party for a few years for the little ones to gather and spook each other with some thrilling measure of safety.

We make a little haunted house...well, really a closet. As my eldest gets older and into a more sophisticated phase of spookiness I am trying to walk a tightrope of thrill without terror. It is far, far too easy to find the terror. A walk down the well-stocked Halloween aisles of the local Wal-Mart is fairly terrifying. The grim reaper costumes, blood-laden masks and various implements of terror abound. I don't take my kids down those rows, for multiple reasons. But as I look at the horrific costumes for children I am deeply saddened. I cannot believe that the desensitization to violent images is healthy for a developing psyche. It is impossible to watch prime time television without being assaulted by commercials for violent television shows or films (CSI, Saw VI). A little green goblin-okay. A spooky ghost-cool. A little witch-fun and cute. Jason with the hockey mask--why? And don't even get me started on the prosti-tot costumes they put out for girls. Does a bee have to be sexy?

C wants to be "The Ocean" for Halloween. I just love it-he came up with it, and had a vision of what it should look like. We went to Hobby Lobby in the big city and got all of the stuff to make it. He picked out the fabric, some shells, some little critters and with the help of Grandma the master seamstress, we indeed, made the ocean. And a hat with a big wave. I'll post a picture if I can figure out how. But the process was a blast. We decorated it together. And I'm sure he will move around in that costume is if he is actually a large body of water. Last year he was a nature spirit and occupied the role completely.

The little ones, ages 4 and 19 months are going to be gnomes, daddy a wise wizard and I a large magical mushroom. We will be at school on the Friday before Halloween creating a fun, ever so slightly mysterious place for the children to explore another self, to be brave in the face of fear, and to receive rewards for their cleverness. I am putting together our little haunted closet as we speak, walking the line between spooky and scary and terrifying. I can't wait to see how it all plays out.